Challenge #3: Improving My Self-Esteem
No matter how many times Nathan tells me I'm beautiful, how often professors say I'm smart, or my friends say I'm strong, I don't always believe it. I try so hard to, but I tend to forget when I need it the most.
So, here's to arrogance for a few sentences:
I am smart, attractive, accomplished, and able. Very little can stand in my way. I change for me, and for nobody else. I care for myself just as I care for others. I am important, worth while, and I deserve good things. I have a driving force that is carrying me through my college years. There are people in my life who love me and care for me, even if I can't see them through the fog. I feel better after venting, and most outlets for stress are acceptable, including sharing that stress with friends. I don't need to apologize for the way I am.
There we go. I feel better now. While this paragraph is tailored to me, each person out there has a list of amazing accomplishments that they may or may not be aware of. I encourage you to write yours, or ask me and I can write it.
Challenge #3: Work in Progress
Q
Could this double as a personals ad? Maybe not.
Thursday, July 9, 2009
Tuesday, June 30, 2009
Quoting Dr. Dodge
Challenge #2 Tolerating Others' Life Styles
If I've learned anything in my year-long experience with Dr. Dodge, professor of Economics at Hanover College, is that he doesn't tolerate laziness and whining. If a person is lazy about getting their work done and fails to do so, then there is no point for them to be wasting money on school. Laziness at work sometimes slide, but in an economy like this, it'll lose you your job in a heartbeat.
I used to be lazy, for sure. I wouldn't finish all my homework in high school, I'd half-ass study for tests, and my grades proved it to be true. Going to Hanover taught me that half-assing your way through life is a waste of time, space, and money. I despise people who simply glide on the accomplishments of others. My strong drive now started out much weaker before I entered drumline.
Drumline taught me that people have to strive for their goals, or else it isn't worth any effort. Teamwork was very essential, because if one person wasn't pulling their weight, the whole drumline became a joke. One missed note, one wrong step, and the judges lose focus on the good and comment on the errors made.
Then getting into college showed me that laziness is just a waste of money, whether it's your money or your parents'.
Don't waste time. You only have 100 years to live, and a third of that time is spent sleeping. So you really only have 66 or so years to live and cherish it.
Yes, people can stress to the point of yelling, but they are also living and striving towards a goal. Motivation comes in many forms, and one of the biggest motivators is setting a goal for yourself. Try it. Try spending time with motivated people. Start small, and eventually you'll strive towards bigger and better things. Never settle for reality.
Challenge #2 Failed.
Q
If I've learned anything in my year-long experience with Dr. Dodge, professor of Economics at Hanover College, is that he doesn't tolerate laziness and whining. If a person is lazy about getting their work done and fails to do so, then there is no point for them to be wasting money on school. Laziness at work sometimes slide, but in an economy like this, it'll lose you your job in a heartbeat.
I used to be lazy, for sure. I wouldn't finish all my homework in high school, I'd half-ass study for tests, and my grades proved it to be true. Going to Hanover taught me that half-assing your way through life is a waste of time, space, and money. I despise people who simply glide on the accomplishments of others. My strong drive now started out much weaker before I entered drumline.
Drumline taught me that people have to strive for their goals, or else it isn't worth any effort. Teamwork was very essential, because if one person wasn't pulling their weight, the whole drumline became a joke. One missed note, one wrong step, and the judges lose focus on the good and comment on the errors made.
Then getting into college showed me that laziness is just a waste of money, whether it's your money or your parents'.
Don't waste time. You only have 100 years to live, and a third of that time is spent sleeping. So you really only have 66 or so years to live and cherish it.
Yes, people can stress to the point of yelling, but they are also living and striving towards a goal. Motivation comes in many forms, and one of the biggest motivators is setting a goal for yourself. Try it. Try spending time with motivated people. Start small, and eventually you'll strive towards bigger and better things. Never settle for reality.
Challenge #2 Failed.
Q
Sunday, June 28, 2009
Miss Independent
This is for those who want to know a bit about me, or are simply looking for some inspiration.
I've faced various challenges and obstacles in my brief existence.
Challenge #1: Becoming independent from men.
I was successfully independent from men after a crippling break up this past October, and enjoyed every minute of loneliness until Nathan reappeared in my life in April. I was able to fall in love again and possibly for the last time. I was able to do this because I had taken the necessary and much needed time to be alone for long enough to realize what was truly important to me. This is something I highly recommend for any person struggling with relationships. You can't see the whole picture until you step back far enough to bring it all into your field of vision.
Nathan allows me to be independent and has helped me become more self-aware. I'm now able to see clearly how I react in various situations, some of which I would resort to old habits. Since I had time to realize what I wanted in a person, I was also able to alter my drawbacks to the best of my ability. Obviously I won't cater to him or change for anybody but myself, but I am a better person than I used to be.
Challenge #1: Check.
Challenge #2: Coming soon!
Q
I've faced various challenges and obstacles in my brief existence.
Challenge #1: Becoming independent from men.
I was successfully independent from men after a crippling break up this past October, and enjoyed every minute of loneliness until Nathan reappeared in my life in April. I was able to fall in love again and possibly for the last time. I was able to do this because I had taken the necessary and much needed time to be alone for long enough to realize what was truly important to me. This is something I highly recommend for any person struggling with relationships. You can't see the whole picture until you step back far enough to bring it all into your field of vision.
Nathan allows me to be independent and has helped me become more self-aware. I'm now able to see clearly how I react in various situations, some of which I would resort to old habits. Since I had time to realize what I wanted in a person, I was also able to alter my drawbacks to the best of my ability. Obviously I won't cater to him or change for anybody but myself, but I am a better person than I used to be.
Challenge #1: Check.
Challenge #2: Coming soon!
Q
Friday, May 29, 2009
Here's to you
Today I spent my morning with my dear friend Drew. While clumsily swinging at a tennis ball back and forth, we shared a conversation, provoked by him.
He asked, "So, Nate? How long have you known him?"
I said, "Well, pretty much my entire life, but we reconnected in high school, and that's where we became such great friends."
Drew - "So what made you start dating him?"
Me - "Well, I guess I finally realized that he's always been there for me, and that I do really care for him, so I thought we could give it a shot. He had liked me for awhile, but I was always with someone else. I, haha, feel as though I had a bit of an epiphany, realizing that I had strong feelings for him! So I told him."
Drew - "On behalf of every man in this world, THANK YOU!"
Me - "Haha, what do you mean?"
Drew - "Do you know how many men live their entire lives in love with their best friend, always wishing for something more, but always been told that they're a 'good friend'? I'm sure Nate was excited to hear you say that to him."
You know, we're taking a big risk, and I'm scared out of my mind. But I want it. It's thrilling. There are many obstacles, but we can conquer them; I know we can.
Q
He asked, "So, Nate? How long have you known him?"
I said, "Well, pretty much my entire life, but we reconnected in high school, and that's where we became such great friends."
Drew - "So what made you start dating him?"
Me - "Well, I guess I finally realized that he's always been there for me, and that I do really care for him, so I thought we could give it a shot. He had liked me for awhile, but I was always with someone else. I, haha, feel as though I had a bit of an epiphany, realizing that I had strong feelings for him! So I told him."
Drew - "On behalf of every man in this world, THANK YOU!"
Me - "Haha, what do you mean?"
Drew - "Do you know how many men live their entire lives in love with their best friend, always wishing for something more, but always been told that they're a 'good friend'? I'm sure Nate was excited to hear you say that to him."
You know, we're taking a big risk, and I'm scared out of my mind. But I want it. It's thrilling. There are many obstacles, but we can conquer them; I know we can.
Q
Thursday, May 21, 2009
The Best of Olympic Park Institute (lots of pictures!)
I just had the best time in the NW these past two weeks! I think I found my new home! Okay, maybe not in the park, but definitely on the west coast! So beautiful, so much life! A wonderful time was had and we learned so much! I wish I had been able to keep up with the day to day stuff on here, but we were already writing a journal for the class! Enjoy the pictures!
I'm just so in love with the NW and I had a lot of time to do thinking about my life and what I want to do in the near and far future. More later on that. In the meantime, some lyrics I can't get out of my head!!!
"Someday we'll know
If love can move a mountain
Someday we'll know
Why the sky is blue
Someday we'll know
Why I was meant for you"
- from " Someday We'll Know" by New Radicals
Q
I'm just so in love with the NW and I had a lot of time to do thinking about my life and what I want to do in the near and far future. More later on that. In the meantime, some lyrics I can't get out of my head!!!"Someday we'll know
If love can move a mountain
Someday we'll know
Why the sky is blue
Someday we'll know
Why I was meant for you"
- from " Someday We'll Know" by New Radicals
Q
Sunday, May 10, 2009
Portland and Seattle
Here are some pictures from Seattle, WA and Portland, OR! Do you think I could make it as a photographer? :-)
Thursday, April 30, 2009
Crush
So here's to another *feeling* blog post. I'm emotionally all over the place at the moment, and trying to avoid studying, so here goes.
I'm feeling like I'm in love. I know it's crazy, but it's true. This song came on my iTunes DJ (whatever the heck they've been doing over there at Apple, my goodness), and it's been playing in my head ever since. It's an awful song, but the lyrics are pretty accurate for right now.
"Crush" Performed by David Archuleta
I hung up the phone tonight
Something happened for the first time deep inside
It was a rush, what a rush
‘Cause the possibility
That you would ever feel the same way about me
It’s just too much, just too much
Why do I keep running from the truth?
All I ever think about is you
You got me hypnotized, so mesmerized
And I’ve just got to know
Do you ever think when you’re all alone
All that we can be, where this thing can go?
Am I crazy or falling in love?
Is it real or just another crush?
Do you catch a breath when I look at you?
Are you holding back like the way I do?
‘Cause I’m trying and trying to walk away
But I know this crush ain’t goin’ away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
Goin’ away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
Has it ever crossed your mind
When we’re hanging, spending time girl, are we just friends?
Is there more, is there more?
See it’s a chance we’ve gotta take
‘Cause I believe that we can make this into something that will last
Last forever, forever
Do you ever think when you’re all alone
All that we can be, where this thing can go?
Am I crazy or falling in love?
Is it real or just another crush?
Do you catch a breath when I look at you?
Are you holding back like the way I do?
‘Cause I’m trying and trying to walk away
But I know this crush ain’t goin’ away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
Goin’ away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
Why do I keep running from the truth?
All I ever think about is you
You got me hypnotized, so mesmerized
And I’ve just got to know
I know, super cheesy. Trust me. I'm one of the most realistic people out there. But right now, man. I don't know what caused it today. Maybe his soft voice (which is rare to hear!) when he showed genuine concern for me? I'm a sucker for low, soft voices. Who knows?
Let's see what happens!
I swear I'll have a legitimate post soon!
Q
I'm feeling like I'm in love. I know it's crazy, but it's true. This song came on my iTunes DJ (whatever the heck they've been doing over there at Apple, my goodness), and it's been playing in my head ever since. It's an awful song, but the lyrics are pretty accurate for right now.
"Crush" Performed by David Archuleta
I hung up the phone tonight
Something happened for the first time deep inside
It was a rush, what a rush
‘Cause the possibility
That you would ever feel the same way about me
It’s just too much, just too much
Why do I keep running from the truth?
All I ever think about is you
You got me hypnotized, so mesmerized
And I’ve just got to know
Do you ever think when you’re all alone
All that we can be, where this thing can go?
Am I crazy or falling in love?
Is it real or just another crush?
Do you catch a breath when I look at you?
Are you holding back like the way I do?
‘Cause I’m trying and trying to walk away
But I know this crush ain’t goin’ away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
Goin’ away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
Has it ever crossed your mind
When we’re hanging, spending time girl, are we just friends?
Is there more, is there more?
See it’s a chance we’ve gotta take
‘Cause I believe that we can make this into something that will last
Last forever, forever
Do you ever think when you’re all alone
All that we can be, where this thing can go?
Am I crazy or falling in love?
Is it real or just another crush?
Do you catch a breath when I look at you?
Are you holding back like the way I do?
‘Cause I’m trying and trying to walk away
But I know this crush ain’t goin’ away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
Goin’ away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
Why do I keep running from the truth?
All I ever think about is you
You got me hypnotized, so mesmerized
And I’ve just got to know
I know, super cheesy. Trust me. I'm one of the most realistic people out there. But right now, man. I don't know what caused it today. Maybe his soft voice (which is rare to hear!) when he showed genuine concern for me? I'm a sucker for low, soft voices. Who knows?
Let's see what happens!
I swear I'll have a legitimate post soon!
Q
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